Good Morning,
My current read is Dave Ramsey’s “The Money Answer Book: Quick Answers to Everyday Financial Questions” (http://www.amazon.com/Money-Answer-Book-Financial-Questions/dp/0849996198). In reading through a section I saw a line that struck me as key to improving our lives. Dave Ramsey said “You cannot fix a problem until you admit you have a problem”.
Getting past the common allusions to Drinking and Gambling Problems we can see that there are indeed issues in our lives that we could easily fix, if we knew we had them.
Sometimes we don’t see these issues because we choose to ignore them: kind of like guys who get lost and refuse to ask for help for fear of bruising their ego instead of stopping and asking for directions.
Sometimes we actually cannot see these issues. For example, being from the northeast I tend to be loud in my speech and walk heavily. This drives my wife Karen crazy. At first when she asked me to quiet down a bit and walk softer, I was caught off-guard. I had no idea I was loud. I knew I talked a lot (and therein laid the problem for Karen). When I stopped and took an introspective look, I saw that I was indeed loud and did clomp around the house. Since that time I have endeavored to correct those issues and in the course of this now see others who are loud and clomp around.
When we see problems we can often fix them easily. When we can see them or admit to them.
So how do we address these problems we cannot see? Addressing the ones we know about and refuse to admit is a subject for another day.
For one, ask a friend or family if they notice anything (try to narrow the area you want looked at down). Choose someone who you know will shoot from the hip. And then be prepared to hear things that may not please you. This is okay, because you will be in a better position to see what is going on in your life that you cannot see.
Once you see these issues from the perspective of others, then you can decide if you wish to address them or not.
Another approach is to spend some time reflecting on times when you said or did something that others became upset with. Is there something that you do or don’t do that you find causes others to get upset with you? If the answer is yes and you can identify this activity or behavior, you can then decide if you want to address it.
Bringing our problems and issues into the open, no matter how we do it, is the best way to give us a chance to correct them.
Enjoy!
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