Message of the Day - Its Harder to Inspire the World if You are a Jerk

Good Morning,

 

My current read is Seth Godin’s book “Poke the Box” (http://www.amazon.com/Poke-Box-Seth-Godin/dp/1936719002/ ). His message, as always, is simple and direct. We need to take initiative, and act. To ship or deliver our product, service, or whatever. The act of taking initiative, taking chances, failing along the way and learning to boot, is key to success in our increasingly faster paced globalized, digitized world.

 

In one section, Seth Godin talks about Dr. Ignaz Semmelweis, the man who discovered that by cleaning their hands, Doctors can drastically reduce the death and disease of their patients.

 

The question posed in the book is why did it take until after Dr. Semmelweis’ death for this life saving concept to take off in the medical world considering how revolutionary and beneficial it is and was to the world.

 

The answer given is that Dr. Semmelweis was a jerk about how he shared his information, or rather how he lorded his discovery over others. In Atul Gawande’s book ‘Better’ there are examples of Dr. Semmelweis’ letters to fellow Doctors.

 

“You, Herr Professor, have been partner in this massacre” and “…I declare before God and the world that you are a murderer.”

 

Kind of makes it hard to want to listen to Dr. Semmelweis’ discovery.

 

It also makes me think of the times that I have had good messages to deliver to others which I might have not delivered in the best way possible. Maybe because I was a bit too preachy or even arrogant in how I delivered the message.

 

At times we may get caught up in the glory of sharing our discovery or accomplishment, rather than ensuring that the message gets delivered.

 

It’s at times like these that we need to remember that we are no better than anyone else. Even if we know something that others really need to know.

 

That when we share what we know and have learned with others, we should do so in a spirit of caring and giving rather than in a spirit of superiority.

 

That no matter how much information we acquire, we are still just another person, no better no worse.

 

I wonder how many lives would have been spared had Dr. Semmelweis understood this concept of humbly sharing wisdom.

 

While what we have to share may not be as earth shattering and life saving, we can at least make sure we deliver our message so it does not put off our audience.

 

That is, don’t be a jerk about it.

 

Thank you for your continued reading of my posts, and I hope you continue to learn something new every day to help you or another grow daily!

 

Enjoy!

 

Sanford Berenberg

Sanford@berenberg.net
http://www.berenberg.net

http://sanfordberenberg.blogspot.com/
Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/sberenberg

http://learnandgrowdaily.com  Click here to order: "Learn And Grow Daily!"

502-533-9336

 

Message of the Day - Being a Copy or Being an Original

Good Morning,

 

I find many people trying to be like someone. A decade or so ago it was ‘Be Like Mike’ in folks wanting to be like Michael Jordan. People go to hair salons to get their hair cut like some of the pretty models. We buy clothes to look like someone famous.

 

In some ways I don’t really have a problem. If anyone knows me, I have no fashion sense. My wife, Karen, buys and organizes my clothing to reduce the chances of me walking out of the house looking like a cast member from ‘Revenge of the Nerds’. When I go to the hair salon, I ask Sally who does my hair to ‘make it look good’ no matter who it ends up looking like (I say that because she is a professional, and I really have no clue what looks good).

 

Some folks, though, try to be like others. Not so much in looks, but in personality, or worse trying to be that person.

 

I have my heroes like Kirk Weisler, Todd Arwood and Hope Stith and others, but so much as a I appreciate them, I know I cannot be them (and Kirk is really cool!), so why even try. Instead, I focus on learning FROM them, rather than being them.

 

It is better, then, to be an original you, then to be just another copy of someone or something else.

 

This concept was shown well in “Voyage of the Dawn Treader,” the C.S. Lewis book turned into movie. During the movie, Lucy, the youngest child who came over to Narnia tries to find ways to be like her older sister, Susan who she is jealous of.

 

At one point she finds a spell to help her look more beautiful. In casting that spell, she finds herself becoming her Sister and losing out on being herself. With some guidance from Aslan and a little maturing, Lucy finds out that it is okay to be herself.

 

A younger girl stowed away on the Dawn Treader to help her dad find her lost mother. At the end of the movie she told Lucy that she wanted to grow up to be just like her.

 

Lucy then told the little girl she should grow up to be just like herself.

 

What wonderful advice.

 

In the past I would ask people ‘What do you want to be when you grow up?’ and waited for the myriad of answers.

 

I know now the best answer is that when I grow up, I want to be me.

 

This may sound like advice to give to children, and it is, but we adults often find ourselves searching for who we are, or hitch our wagon on who we want to be. It is at those moments we need to stop and remember this advice.

 

Do we want to be a copy of something or someone else, or do we want to be an original. An original us.

 

Enjoy!

 

 

Sanford Berenberg

Sanford@berenberg.net
http://www.berenberg.net

http://sanfordberenberg.blogspot.com/
Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/sberenberg

http://learnandgrowdaily.com  Click here to order: "Learn And Grow Daily!"

502-533-9336

 

 

 

Message of the Day - Make the Right Turn at Albuquerque

Good Morning,

 

Today I had the chance to watch Todd Arwood (www.toddarwood.com) give a wonderful presentation on Mojo, and what we need to do to get and keep our Mojo, and avoid those who would steal it from us.

 

As the event was getting ready to start, I was having a chat with my boss, Barb. In the course of the conversation, something profound came out and as we both were thinking about it, we both said, this is a message of the day, at the same time.

 

It goes like this:

 

1. When I hold myself to higher standards than those around me, that is, when others see me doing something well, and I still feel that I can do better, that I am being tough on myself, but often in a healthy way. That is, I know what is expected of me, and I am not only doing it, I am doing it well.  

 

2. When I hold myself to lower standards than those around me, that is, when others see me doing something poorly, and I still feel that I am doing a great job, than I am clearly not understanding what is needed, almost being delusional of what my goals are.

 

In the first, I have the opportunity to settle for less than what I feel is my very best, and know that my work is respected.

 

In the second, I have the opportunity to fail, my work is not respected, and it is a sign that I am out of touch with what my goals truly are.

 

The interesting point in this, is we don’t always know if we are working in the realms of the first or the second. That is, we think we know what is expected of us, but for some reason it just eluded us and we kept on going.  

 

At those times, we need to look around, to ask, to find out where we are.

 

If we don’t do some sort of touch base every now and then, we could find ourselves working on a project off by ourselves because we took a wrong turn somewhere and never checked to see where we ended up. Kind of like Bugs Bunny and his wrong turn in Albuquerque.

 

This will be a challenge for some folks who even when the reality of a situation hits them, they still can’t get it.

 

The good news is that when we stop and look at our goals, and then look at what we have been doing, and look at others who have achieved what we are looking for, we have the potential to get a clearer view of what is expected of us. And then we can raise our standards on our own work, knowing that it is, and not making a wrong turn at Albuquerque.

 

Enjoy!

 

Sanford Berenberg

Sanford@berenberg.net
http://www.berenberg.net

http://sanfordberenberg.blogspot.com/
Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/sberenberg

http://learnandgrowdaily.com  Click here to order: "Learn And Grow Daily!"

502-533-9336

 

 

Message of the Day - Leadership Lessons from Ben Franklin

Good Morning,

 

My current read is “The Leadership Secrets of Billy Graham” by Harold Myra and Marshall Shelly (http://www.amazon.com/Leadership-Secrets-Billy-Graham/dp/0310255783). It is full of amazing information on all levels of leadership and much of it is very practical in everyday life.  So far I am about 1/3 the way through the book and learning a lot.

 

In one section there is a quote from Ben Franklin, where Ben is giving advice to John Paul Jones via letter. He wrote:

 

“If you should observe an occasion to give your officers and friends a little more praise than is their due, and confess more fault than you can justly be charged with, you will only become the sooner for it, a great captain.”

 

This is alignment with Jim Collin’s work in Good to Great where Level 5 Leaders when looking to give praise, look out the window, and when looking to find fault, look into a mirror.  Ben Franklin just takes it a step further.

 

The challenge, though, is the nature of leaders and managers to protect their pride and ego by giving blame, withholding praise, and refusing to share in the fault.

 

A sad part of this is those leaders who wish to be strong and never admit mistakes, or rarely give praise, are often seen as hardnosed bullies who people fear and or hate working with.

 

How long does a good team run at top performance being driven by fear? Usually not long.

 

Giving praise, even when we give too much at times is okay, per Ben Franklin, so long as it is not given to the point that every little thing gets praised, making the praise itself mundane. Ken Blanchard and Spencer Johnson in the One Minute Manager talk about finding people doing something right and praising them. By giving praise at these times, we reinforce the behavior we want from our teams.

 

In the second part of the advise, we learn that leaders who allow themselves to be vulnerable to their teams will find their teams will more readily follow them, understand them, defend them and work harder for them.

 

I like knowing that my managers are fallible humans like myself. I can identify with that.

 

A leader who pretends to be flawless in the face of his team or direct reports, is often nothing more than a phony who is scared to appear human. To maintain that facade, they often become cold and distant. Not the type of leader I want to follow, much less be myself.

 

From the man who gave us ‘A penny saved is a penny earned’ , here is another pearl of wisdom for everyone who will ever be in a leadership position.

 

It is assumed John Paul Jones took Ben Franklin’s advice and headed into the history books.

 

Question is, will you heed his advice?

 

Enjoy!

 

Sanford Berenberg

Sanford@berenberg.net
http://www.berenberg.net

http://sanfordberenberg.blogspot.com/
Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/sberenberg

http://learnandgrowdaily.com  Click here to order: "Learn And Grow Daily!"

502-533-9336

 

 

Message of the Day - Don't Be a Gladstone

Good Morning,

 

I really enjoy this next piece:

 

There’s an old story of a young lady who was taken to dinner one  evening by William Gladstone and then the following evening by Benjamin  Disraeli, both eminent British statesmen in the late nineteenth century.

“When I left the dining room after sitting next to Mr. Gladstone, I  thought he was the cleverest man in England,” she said. “But after  sitting next to Mr. Disraeli, I thought I was the cleverest woman in  England.”

 

Disraeli obviously had a knack for making the other person the center  of his universe, if only for the evening. If you practice attentiveness  to others, you’ll find it does wonders. They will enjoy it, and so will  you. You will accomplish much more.

 

It’s really easy to make ourselves the center of the world like William Gladstone did in that story. His focus was on showing his audience how great and wonderful he was. It was a passing fancy and his greatness will be lost by the audience when the next person tries to do the same time.

 

On the other hand, it is not so easy to focus on our audience and put them on a pedestal and learn from them, making them feel like the most interesting person in the world. Our audience will remember that time for a real long time.

 

A passing ooh-ahh story about Gladstone, or a lasting wow from Disraeli. Which do you think makes the most impact on someone’s life.

 

If you guessed Disraeli, you are correct!

 

Just like the sweetest word anyone can hear is someone speaking their name (props to Dale Carnegie) one of the most enriching experiences is to share about yourself and have people be truly enjoy hearing about you.

 

We can give that to others just by changing the focus from us being the center of the universe for a short bit.

 

I have tried to change my focus when listening to others to drop what I am doing if I can and listen to them. Really listen to what they are saying. In this endeavor, I have learned a lot about a lot from people who may seem ordinary or boring, who actually have a wealth of knowledge to share. I did that this weekend when volunteering time to help a local Boy Scout Troop I work with. When we had breaks I sat and listened to those who talked. I asked questions to learn more and found the conversations to be very interesting.

 

I’ve noticed how smiles grow as others share what they are passionate about, and I walk away with some knew knowledge and often a new friend.

 

There is power in listening, but sadly few stop long enough to do it. I still find myself fighting the urge to talk about me, and dominate a conversation. When I can shut my own trap and listen, there are very often fruits of wisdom to be had by the everyday people we interact with in our lives.

 

Don’t be a Gladstone, let others share about themselves and learn. Share when appropriate, but don’t dominate the conversations.

 

Be a Disraeli and listen. You will find that you can learn and grow daily just from listening to others.

 

Enjoy!

 

Sanford Berenberg

Sanford@berenberg.net
http://www.berenberg.net

http://sanfordberenberg.blogspot.com/
Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/sberenberg

http://learnandgrowdaily.com  Click here to order: "Learn And Grow Daily!"

502-533-9336

 

 

Message of the Day: Advice that Grows with You

Good Morning,

 

This past Sunday afternoon, I was privileged to participate in an Eagle Scout Court of Honor for a young man in the Scout Troop I help out in. It was an inspiring event with a lot of love and caring for the Eagle Scout and those in attendance. It made me think back to my Eagle Banquet back on Long Island, New York some 26 years ago.  

 

While I do not remember all the proceedings of my banquet, I do remember one bit of advice given to me by one of the district leaders who sat next me during the event.

 

He said, “Taste your eggs before you put on salt and pepper”

 

At first glance this seemed like good breakfast advice, but every so often, when I think back to those words, I find another level of wisdom hidden in these words.

 

It is as if the wisdom itself shares another aspect of itself as I grow and mature. 

 

Here are a few things that these words have meant to me over the years:

 

1.       Don’t judge something without testing it first. Like putting salt and pepper on eggs that don’t need it.

 

2.       I need to make my own decisions in life, and for me to do that, I need see for myself what is going on.

 

3.       Don’t rush to judgment just because of what something appears to be. Sometimes what looks like a duck is not a duck.

 

4.       I need to be myself in all things. I can decide if I want salt and pepper or not, it is up to me, if I choose to make the decision.

 

5.   Just because I can do something, does not mean that I should. I can use the condiments or I can pass.  I should weigh each situation based on its own merits.

 

6.   My personal preferences are important. I do not need to allow others to pressure me to accept their preferences.

 

7.   Something can be just right the way it is. Natural is often better, so before modifying, check it out as it is.

 

I look forward to new interpretations I will get from this wonderful bit of wisdom given to me nearly three decades ago. I also look forward to hearing from this newly minted Eagle to see how it is helped him look at the world.

 

Each of us have encountered bits of wisdom shared with us from many different sources in our lives. It might be an interesting exercise to look back and see what we have learned from them and how that wisdom has shaped our lives.

 

Give it a try.

 

Enjoy!

 

Sanford Berenberg

Sanford@berenberg.net
http://www.berenberg.net

http://sanfordberenberg.blogspot.com/
Follow Me on Twitter! http://twitter.com/sberenberg

http://learnandgrowdaily.com  Click here to order: "Learn And Grow Daily!"

502-533-9336